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Tuesday, March 30, 2010

News Flash! This just in, Fruit Loops and Crunch Berries are in fact not fruit related! Lawsuit pending!

Yes you read that correctly, some jackass in sunny California has gotten it into his head he can get a fat payday by suing Kelloggs and Qauker because Froot Loops and Capatain Crunch with Crunch Berries are not fruit related! A judge tossed the Fruit loops case on the grounds of the idea as being utterly ridiculous, but get this the Crunch Berry case is moving forward! A about year ago or so a woman tried to file suit with Qauker because there weren't any such thing as Crunch Berry bushes any where in the world. Anyone with half a brain knows Yoko Ono had them torn out and destroyed decades ago just like she sued the cereal Strawberry Fields out of existance.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Burger King goes slasher!

What a fragging day! Chucky,Freddy Krueger,Jason Vorhees and the Scream Killer all frequent Burger King during the night shift? I'm not sure what this new ad campaign is all about or what Burger King is trying to express with it! This is why I don't work the night shift!

Shogun Warriors the movie with life size robots!!!!!!!!

Like the Legendary Godzilla movie confirmation wasn't enough to have me in total bliss! I get this nugget of joy aswell! Jules Urbach a man of serious vision has optioned Giaking and other giant robots from the old 70's mattel toy line to be featured in a huge (and I mean huge literally!) 3-D flick! Instead of the usual cop-out of cgi Jules has opted for life size robots to slug it out on screen! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it Cameron! Wow! If this does well the sequel will be Shogun warriors with even more Giant robots! I hoping beyond hope that Godzilla and Rodan show up, they were part of the toy line afterall! So add this to Voltron,Robotech and the Battletech flicks on the way.

Holy smeg it's true! Legendary Pictures is making a new Godzilla movie for the USA!

I've heard about this project for quite some time but I didn't say much about it due to the fact I never really expected it to happen, especially after the Tri Star mess! Legendary pictures is partnering up with Warner Bros to do this like they teamed with them to make 300 and The Dark Night. So I have some faith that this will be a Godzilla we can recognise. They(Legendary) Say they want to go for the elements that made the old Godzilla films great and stay authentic to the characters! To me that says alien invaders, super science weapons and another big monster to throw down with! Toho will be handling the Japanese distribution of the flick. As I learn more about this I'll share the info. I wonder what the promotional stuff will be like? Fast food toys,cereal,ect... The flick is scheduled for a 2012 release! Maybe this will light a fire under J.J. Abrams ass to get a sequel to Cloverfield of the ground all fraging ready as his dream of an iconic american monster is being washed away.....

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Taco Bell is giving away free Atari games!!!!!!!

I made a run for the border earlier tonight and When I ordered my little daughter her kids meal she immediately tore into it to see what her free toy was. She was a bit perplexed by her prize...It was a mac and PC cd-rom of of Ataris Lunar Lander! Obvisously dad was much more excited than she was. They also have Super Break out, Missile Command,and Super Asteroids! My wife was a bit confused why I came home with an arm load of Taco bell Kids meals. My little one actually enjoyed playing the games with me, it was fun to share some thing from my childhood with her.

Ever wanted to take a bath in Ectoplasm? Then give Gelli Baff a whirl!

Yuck! Seriously Yuck! Now kids can play in a whole tube full of brightly colored goop and get mosturized at the same time!

Marshmallow gun and blaster! From Marshmallow Fun

These are pretty cool executive items! Just because you grow up and become sucessful doesn't mean you can't have cool toys to play with at work! They have a Ghostbusters vibe going for them don't they?

Native American Indian Feather Pops???????

Wow....I thought we were beyond all this type of thing with being politically correct and all. These actually showed at the New York Toy Fair this year.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Return of Voltron and Jumbo Machinders!!!!!!!

This really got me excited when I saw these at Toyfare this year! Jumbo Machinders are great and Voltron is pretty cool, mix the two together and you have a winner in my book! Keeping my fingers crossed they make some villians or license some othe characters like Dia Majin, Mecha Godzilla,Gorgo, ect....

Friday, March 26, 2010

Heidi Montag wants to fight 3-D sharks with her breasts??????

Yes Mtv has at long last put the kabosh on the Hills so Heidi thinks she can now be a Hollywood mogul! Hmmm....
Her big plan to launch this dream is to make a movie based on a screen play she wrote, a beach comedy about a beach town attacked by a shark that she must fight with her breasts! She even wrote a part for Dolly Pardon as the town mayor! I don't think even Uwel Boll could be this arrogant! Not even Ed Wood would have touched this with a ten foot pole. Best of luck Heidi.

What do you get when you cross Willy Wonka with Saw? Gobstopper!

Those guys at Funny or Die make the best faux trailers ever! Christopher Lyod as a phsycotic Willy Wonka, canniabalistic Ommpa Lompa's and the dreaded secret ingredient make for one hell of a flick concept! The original Charlie and the Chocolate factory was creepy as it was!

Revoltech 1957 Mogera,Gamera,Gaos and 1963 Mothra!!!!!!!!

Wow! These look fragging incredible! Add this to the already seen Baragon and Dia Majin and I'm in dia kaiju heaven! These retail for under 20 bucks each! I think I've found my favorite company for dia kaiju toys!

Marvel Comics Punisher joins the ranks of the undead in Punisher#15!!!!!!! Trashes Nazi Zombie Horde!

Marvel must have decided the occult was the way to go after the success of the Marvel Zombies. Brother VooDoo is now Doctor VooDoo the new Sorcerer Supreme and Frank Castle aka The Punisher has become a reanimated highly armed super freak called Franken-Castle! It all starts with a literal bang in issue 15 of the Punisher when Franken-Castle takes on a million nazi zombies standing between him and his target. Marvel has publicy stated this new franken-castle is here to stay and not a one trick pony/stunt to generate sales. it can't be any worse than when Frank was trashing demons during his Max reboot.

Buck Rodgers the movie!

I'm okay with this actually, Buck rodgers has been around since 1920 and is a great action/adventure hero. The studio bringing this our way is Paradox Entertainment, the irony that they hired Paul W.S. Anderson to direct is not lost on me.

Smell like a Iron Man!

Underneath all that metal and circuts it must be uncomfortable and hot, so it makes sense Tony Stark would want to freshen up between battles as his armour is lacking a exo shower attachment. The good folks at Diesel have produced a limited edition Iron Man 2 Cologne for tough guys! It even comes in a big red iron fist!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Cereal Killers, the book!

Since 2006 i've waited and waited for this to finally be published. I gotten plenty of up dates on it and lots and lots of pics of it contents, but not the book itself. Reminds quite a bit of Mr. Robb berry and his Magazine Planet-Q; he stated the new issue would be out October 2009....Still waiting. Also still waiting for his 70's cereal boxes and premiums guide book he mentioned years ago and even showed a cover for. Sometimes if your fans wait to long they lose interest and go away.....

Endangered Species, Eli Roth's Giant monster/kaiju flick

Seems this has been on the burner for awhile but is now moving right along. Eli has stated his monster will be something grounded in realality, just freaking huge! No aliens,robots,or virus; just something unexpected that once roamed the earth now runing amuk. Well dinosaurs,big apes,giant snakes,mega sharks,giant octopuses, and bugs have been done over and over. So what exactly will Eli Roth mutate to giant size?

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Iron Sky: Return of the Moon Nazis!

This is a cool little movie I got to peep. In 1945 a group of Nazi's based in Antartica Who had been working on saucer technology(There were actual reports of Nazi saucers back then.) escape to the moon. Years pass and they sucessfully colonize the dark side of the Moon. 2018 they launch an invasion of Earth! This was made by the same guys who did the popular web flick Star Wreck. Iron Sky is set for world wide theatrical release!

Alien versus Winnie the Pooh?????!!!!????!!!!!!!

This is just way to fragging strange even for me! At first I thought I was imagining this odd e-book, but it's real, very real! G.H. Burger is a strange individual who will be sued out of existance. Google Alien vs Pooh if you want to. I can't imagine disney letting this stay up for long as they are very protective of there icons, remember what happened to the Air Pirate Funnies or The uncensored Mouse comics? Ridley Scott will probably just chuckle though...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Norman...Norman! Listen too your mother! Polar Lights reissuies the Bates Physco Mansion kit!

This is a great kit! This time they ramped it up and included a light set and Normans mother plus the option to do a hill top build aswell, hill not included. Overall this crazygroovycool!

Super great new Creature from the Black Lagoon select figure.

Wow this thing is great! This the most detailed and coolest Creature from the Black Lagoon action figure ever made! You will be able to get these from your favorite comic/hobby shop. $17.99 is a steal for this!

Teaser for the cover of Famous Monsters of Filmland #251

Heres a teaser of the cover. Looks good so far.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Yeah baby! Yeah! Austin Powers 4 on the way!!!!

This will either rock or it will suck, The big question here what will they do with it? Austins already been to the moon, traveled through time, been cyro-frozen,and has been reunited with his long lost brother/ex-arch enemey Doctor Evil. How many characters will Myers play this time?

Human Torch cast as Captain America??????

This will be a bit strange. Chris Evans has been cast as Captain America. Thats quite an odd choice given he has already been a another Marvel icon, the Human Torch! Twice! How they can get the geeks of the world to go for this is beyond me, myself included.

Sour Patch Jelly beans!

Another of my old favorites given the jelly bean treatment redux. I was a fan of Sour Patch Kids back when they were little Red Martians, remember those?

MMM fizzing candy..... Skittles Fizzl'd Fruits

Yum! Being a fan of Zotzs and Pop Rocks these are right up my alley! Just don't make the mistake I did and wash them down with ginger ale, WHOOO! I had foam spray out of my nose! I nearly had a Mikey moment! I found mine at Target.

A Serbian Film...The Most extreme Horror flick????

Ole shi shi boy tex over at Bloodydisgusting couldn't handle this as it was to much for him. As for me well I'm a different breed altogether. If you liked flicks like Martyrs,Inside,Antichrist,Men Behind the Sun ect... Then this is for you. far too long have horror flicks be sanitized with humor and comedy relief to ease the impact of the horror itself. This film will not offer any mercy it will be the truest and most real thing you will ever see. The real world is brutal and finally theres a film maker who has the intestonial fortitude to show it. That being said this film will be villified and reviled all over the world and it should be, your average person should never be subjected to this level of realality ever! For the rare few of us who need it to get us through here it is.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Star Trek fans Versus Zombies!?!?! Trekkies against the undead.

I Guess it had to happen didn't it? Abraham Lincoln is a vampire hunter, pride &predjudice and zombies are being made into a feature films. So this is just a natural progression. This odd mash-up is a upcoming book (so far) from Quirk Fiction, I expect the 3-D movie to be announced any second. The basic plot is this a Star Trek Fan Convention finds itself undersiege from a zombie horde and the trekkies fight for there lives using knowledge they obtained from watching Star Trek. Alrighty then....

This reminds me of an old episode of the Kids Next Door when they had to fight off nerd zombies.

INGAGI! Granddady of the hoax documentary!

           A little while back the estemed Cryptozoologist Loren Colemen over at Cryptomundo had brought out a topic called sex and the single sasqautch, now before you all go Beavis and Butthead on me with the huh-huh-huhs this was a very serious topic of discussion, still is actually. It touched on aspects of hybridization of humans and apes. The oliver theory was brought up, an account of a curious sasqautch coming to see a porn chic at her trailer(the clip of this unlikely event and most likely a flat out hoax was on national tv.) and a few people touched on the old russian scientific experiments in the late 50's early 60's to impregnate volunteer human females with chimp semen via artifical insemination.

          This whole thing kept diging at the back of my mind about something I had seen many years ago but couldn't recall it, then it hit me like a bolt out of the blue! The 1930 Congo pictures release of the  so claimed real scientific documentary film INGAGI!  This was heralded as 100% real on its release! It promised flat out human female male gorilla mating and there resulting ofspring of these unnatural unions. INGAGI was supposedly the name for gorillas of that particular area. This was the film to see as the lure of the forbidden union of woman and beast was just too irresistable to the movie going public of the time!

           The flim was a complete hoax and the adventurers Sir Hubert Wienstead and Capt. Danile Swaine were totally and utterly ficticious! It definately made serious money though, it had an opening day of $4,000.00! Now I know your thinking thats nothing! Ticket prices were 30 cents so thats huge box office! Especially considering it didn't have any distribution but had to be booked theater by theater! It totally out performed all of it's competition and critics loved it! In the end RKO pictures would come out of this and from it King Kong, go figure. To this day INGAGI is considered one of the most successful promotinal campaigns ever, the precurssor to the virial marketing campaigns of today.

         Now mocumentary flicks or the famous based on actual/true events gimick is old hat, but in 1930 it was new, exciting and the public fell for it hook,line and sinker! I can almost picture Tom Biscardi as the man behind this if he was there back then.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Lost Japanese King Kong movies

Contrary to popular belief Godzilla wasn't the first giant monster to invade Japan. King Kong beat him to the punch by 21 years! The first was titled simply enough Japanese King Kong it came out in 1933 from the Shochiku company and was directed by Torajiro Satio. This some what simular to the concept of Spainish Dracula wich was released in the same year as the original Dracula.

The Next Japanese King Kong movie was King Kong arrives in edo in 1938 in it King Kong arrives in  Edo (modern Tokoyo) of Japan. It was Produced by the Zensho Kimena studio. Sadly all that remains of any of these films is just one claimed lone photo of Japanses King Kong and the interview of the man who did the special effects for King Kong arrives in Edo on Sci-Fi Japan In wich he States it was Japans First Special Arts film.

First look at Roger Cormans Sharktopus!

Frankly this doesn't really give much of an impression of what it will look like and also dispells the hope that this beasty was going to be huge. But then again we don't know for sure it's just a pic of a prop arriving on location. A lot of giant monster props are small. Did you really think Ray Harryhausen animatied models that were hundreds of feet tall? Lets wait and see.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

We've lost Davey Crockett, Fess Parker.

Fess Parker famous as the Walt Disney's Davey Crockett was responisble for one of the first tv/pop culture crazes in the 50's as kids every where went bananas for coon skin caps, buck skin clothes, toy rifles,ect... It totally took Disney by surprise! The theme song made it to the top of pop charts and stayed their for 13 weeks!  Fess Parker would also later star as Daniel Boone until the show ended in 1970.

Well thats number three, seems that celebrities always die in clusters of three.

This just in: New Karate Kid movie stinks! Doesn't have any Karate in it!?!?

I just saw this clunker and boy does it suck! Jaden Smith named Dre for the flick is about as interesting as a used tampon in this or anything else he happens to be in. You have weak dialog, poor direction, Jaden Smith, and slow drag along first 45 min, and the real head scratcher, NO KARATE! Yes you read that right a new remake/ass rape of a beloved 80's franchise called The Karate Kid without any Karate in it! WTF!!!!! I does feature Kung-Fu as Jaden is trained by the schools janitor/KungFu master Jackie Chan in the art of "Kung Fu" after he has the crap beat out of him several times by the school bully for him trying with all the game his 10 year old self can muster for trying to get with a girl.  So comes the competion where Jaden will face off against the bully and punk him out in front of a big crowd. Snore....

Tim Burton to direct stopmotion animation Addams Familiy movie!!!!!!!!

WHOA! This bit of news caught out me completely out of left field! Mr. Burton will be doing this project for Illumination Studios. From what I gather it will be largely based on the original Chaz Addams material that appeared in the New Yorker magazine and not on the 60's tv show or the 90's films. The 60's show just barely hinted at who and what the Addams were about. Gomez was totally maniacal in the original toons at slight hint of that was shown in the open seqeunce of the 60's tv show with Gomez gleefully sharpening the spikes on the top of the fence in the front yard. this will be very intersting, a hell of a lot more interesting than Illuminations other film project Wheres Waldo?

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Rest in peace Alex Chilton

Perhaps the most gifted singer song writter ever has left us at the all to young age of 59. Starting his carrer at just 16 he was a singer and guitarist for the band The Box Tops who had a major hit with The Letter in 1967. Later in 1970 when The Box Tops fell apart he formed the cult group Big Star, the debut album titled #1 Record never really made it that far; neither did there other two releases Radio City and Sister Lovers. Rollingstone magazine listed all three Big Star albums in there list of the 500 most important albums of all time. I always loved the songs The ballad of ElGoodo,September Gurls and In the Streets.

The 8th Voyage of Sinbad!

This is one franchise I really want brought back! I loved the old Sinbad flicks back in the day. This one has our hero seeking the golden head of the Collossus of Rhodes and has Sinbad and his crew end up on the island of Minoa wich just still happens to be ruled by the Minotaur! Sinbad and his crew battle their way through the island facing the minotaurs monsterous minions and finially battling the Minotaur himself for the vast and fabulous treasure of the island! The only down beat to this is that it's a syfy original movie, could have been great....

Lake Placid 3!?!?

You can blame yourselves for this one! Lake Placid 2 was the most watched syfy saturday movie ever so naturally they had to milk the cow again. A game warden and his family move into the house by lake now that his aunt is long since digested. The wardens son takes to feeding some baby crocs that he regards as pets. Three years pass by and the crocs now regard him and his mother and father as chow!

Dinocroc versus Supergator! War of the made for TV cgi Movie Monsters!

You knew this was going to happen. This also features David Carradine! Somehow both of these labatory experiments run amuk in the same piece-o realestate and the big plan for doing away with them after minor firepower  fails and the supply of hot chics in bikinis and tourist in hawian shirts is eaten up by the ramapging reptiles is to lead them to face off against each other because apparantly as one of characters puts it crocs and gators are natural enemies, much in same way mega sharks and giant octopuses are natural enemies. I want syfy to commission a movie that features all of there made for tv movie critters in a Destroy All Monsters type of mash up, they can call it The clash of everything from everything else! Tell me you wouldn't watch that!

Holy smeg! The Legend Boggy Creek is getting remade!?!?

If your going to remake a favorite cheesey old movie at least throw enough cash at it to look like it was worth the effort to rape my nostalgia. Instead of a creepy documentary style,they opted for a been there done that pretty white kids stalked and slaughtered by a roving monster stichk, you know that old chestnut...The clip I saw of this was terrible! I coulda had a V-8! Sometimes I wish I could unsee some of the stuff I subject myself to! Never more so than now! I refuse to even post a pic from it! Uwe Bol could have done better! I am dreading the day I get news of the Attack of the Killer Tomato's remake/reboot.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The Cannibal Chicken Eaters!

  I figured the out there chicken poultry horror mutation thing had ran its course with flicks like Blood Freak and Troma's Poultrygiest. Theres also a giant chicken Kaiju flick in the works about a giant chicken monster from outerspace in developement aswell! What hell do I know?  Now that I have you scratching your heads wondering what i'm on about i'll give you some plot details. A couple is having relationship problems and are at a local chicken shack. she likes the dirty bird but her man hates the stuff. A pair of money lusting loons at the Broiler Chicken factory try to amp up there product and bank accounts with a few additives that have some out there side effects, like turning anyone who eats it into a mad as hell cannibal! you would think they would want to make them wild for more chicken, but like I said earlier in this post what the hell do I know? It also seems that mutations occur in people who have partaken of the cluckers meaty goodness. I wonder what Col. Sanders would make of all this?

"Monsters" a new and strange film being brought to us!

Magnet releasing has aquired the rights to a very out there flick titled "Monsters". The basic set up is this. A Nasa Space shuttle crashed in Mexico and various alien life forms got loose in the enivorment and well things are very bad. Invasive species are bad enough to deal with when they come from earth so you can imagine the eco-chaos something like this would cause. A very skaken american tourist couple shell out some serious bucks to a Mexican river boat captain in an attempt to make it back to American border of the uninfected zone(the Infected Zone is quite a large chuck of real estate that is loaded with monsters from outer space of varying types.) and the trip is quite a harrowing experience for all involved.

The clip I saw was quite chilling and effective. It featured our protagonist on the river boat at dusk with the crew trying to get the boat going again and then something start moving in the water almost looking like a fin. It moves closer in a some what random pattern then it breaks the surface and it revealed to be an F-14 Tomcat! The people look somewhat releaved and surprised(wouldn't you be?) until they stop a moment to think what brought the plane up to the surface?  Right at that moment a haunting whale like cry is heard. Seriously creepy and atmospheric!

They have my attention! How about yours?

HBO teases True Blood season 3!

If you hate Twilight as much as I do then you might enjoy HBO's True Blood. I had very little interest in the books, and always thought the name Sookie Stackhouse was the silliest name of all time; but I do like the show. Finally we will get werewolves in the new season and they will be major players, very dangerous major players. They were teased at and named dropped during the first two seasons of True Blood so it will be nice to finally see them in action. I have no idea if they will look like wolves or more like wolfmen as of yet. Hopefully we can get some zombies or ghouls for good measure also down the road. How cool would it be to see a werewolf versus Bigfoot throw down? Thats never been done before!

Ultraman Tiga back on tv in the USA! In Northern California anyway....

If your in Northern California you can catch 18 episodes of Ultraman Tiga uncut with english subtitles on channel UTB!  Cool! Sucks it's in such a limited area. Episodes air Saturday and Sunday mornings two at a time. I remeber when it made its american debut of Fox's Fox block saturday mornings. Fox block was great but short lived sadly. They had a lot of shows that came and went with out warning and always mixed up the schedule so you never really new when your show would be on. Tiga started out comedy style dubbed ala USA's Nightflight Dynaman then subtitled(The announcement/promo for this was "When dubbing just isn't enough!") but after half a season it was gone forever.

You would have thought it would have had legs with the kids, seeing as how Power Rangers still chugs along. Kamen Rider also seems to have a good foot hold on american tv aswell.

Roger Cormans Sharktopus is on the way!

It's really true! The nasty critter will run rampant around a mexican resort after getting out of the U.S Navy's control from there Somali pirate extermination program(use of guns and rockets would have attracted unwanted attention it seems from various goverments and would have caused quite a stir in the U.N.). Only Roger Corman could set up an out there concept like this and make people want to see it! If they get the band It came from Pier Thriteen to do the theme song that would be the cherry on top! There are t-shirts and whole discusion forums dedicated to the up coming SyFy channel freak show! I know this much it has to be better than Asylums Mega shark versus Giant Octopus(Yes I fell for the hype on that one two.) or the old italian flick Monster Shark.

The overall design reminds me of the sea monster from Deep Rising, as the Sharktopus is being rumored to have multiple mouths and be plain stange looking. The other hottly talked about point is that will be a giant monster/kaiju, though that has yet to be confirmed. Word is corman doesn't think the design is weird enough yet! How much wierder can it get than it isn't already? It's a freaking shark with tentacles! Speaking of giant water monsters what ever happened to Brian Yunzas flick Amphibious? You know the one about the giant prehistoric Sea Scorpion run amuk.

America needs more giant monster flicks especially after J.J. Abrams wetted the american appetite with Cloverfield and now he needs to get his ass in gear and make a new one! He wanted America to have an iconic giant monster in the same league as Godzilla is in Japan. Well that will take some doing seeing as big G has 28 movies under his belt and is literally everywhere in Japanese culture. Cloverfield barely even had a monster in it for petes sake! He even went so far as to say Heroes,Lost and Cloverfield were all in the same universe and then went no where with that concept. Get to fragging work Abrams!

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Yogi Bear movie December 17th 2010, Dan Aykroyd as Yogi! Justin Timberlake as Boo-boo!

You can blame this on Alvin and the Chipmunks 1 & 2 raking in the box office dollars. The point of the film is a documentary filmaker goes to Jellystone to film Jellystone National park before Mayor Brown shuts it down due lack of biz. He crosses paths with Yogi and Boo-Boo. Yogi and Boo-Boo  must partner up with there old nemesis Ranger Smith and prove once and for all he really is smarter than the average bear before he, Boo-Boo and Ranger Smith are left homeless. I not sure if Aykroyd is Yogi material though. But hey at least it's not Seth Rogen right. Steve Carol would be a perfect Ranger Smith.

Good bye Mr. Phelps.... Peter Graves has passed away.

He was 83 and died at his home of natural causes. Many of you probably know him from Mission Impossible, or Biography. I'll always remember him as the pervert captain from Airplane 1 and 2 with a thing for turkish prisons, and his out there movie Clonus the Parts Horror, wich itself was remade a few years back as the Island.